Not so much Road Trips: Porcupine Rim Trail Adventures
Not so much Road Trips; “Eight hours into the Porcupine Rim Trail and we decided to pick up the pace.” This sentence leads me to two conclusions; one they are aliens, and two, even given that weird kind of ability, I’ll never be allowed to have that kind of vacation. Think about it. “Honey, can I take all the vacation money and head across the continent and possibly kill myself in some remote MTN biking Mecca?” he asked from behind the fridge door cowaringly.
But this is the scene I am inundated with every time I pick up a magazine or watch alittle Fattrax. I am sure that there is epic quality riding in Moab, Crested Butte, etc., but that I’ll probably never see it. Does that mean that I should feel less then fulfilled as a MTN biker? Yeah probably.
The need to travel is endemic to all of us who MTN bike. If not the North Shore in Vancouver then where? News Flash! Maybe you can find adventure closer to home. In my own province of Nova Scotia, there are two rides I have heard lots about but had never found the time for. The first is less then two hours down the road in the Wentworth Valley, and the second on Cape Breton Island in a town called Mabou.
Man is not an Island unto himself. Plus I don’t carry any tools. Therefore an accomplise was called for. Every hero needs a sidekick. I the Calfless Wonder have, dun dun dun dah, Mango Man. After noticing the Ride Beacon was in the sky our two heros loaded the Yellow Submarine and hit the road. (The Yellow Submarine is a classic 91 Toyota Previa.) Apparently the marriages were going to surrive our little adventure for we had tacit approval from our ever understnding and tolerant Life Partners.
“Mango, did you remember the beer, the tools, the tent, the bags, the food, the pump, the map, the cell phone, the ball gloves, the Sega, the beer, the mud tires, the beer, and the lights?”
“Why yes Wonder I did.”
“Cool, I got my lucky hat, I guess we’re good to go.”
“Yes Wonder it appears so, but did you remember your Tony Kid Calf Shaper?” snickeringly jabbed Mango Man.
“Funny man! But who’ll be laughing when your broken down on the trail and you have to come crawling to…(it was that second that The Calfless Wonder realized he couldn’t even change a tire and relied completely on his sidekick for mechanical asssistance and stammered…)”Just drive.”
“Yes of fearful freak.”
“For the last time it’s fearless friend!”
Two pastry breaks and one hour and fourty minutes later our heros arrive in Wentworth at the Valley Inn. A weirdly tucked out of the way joint, reasonably priced and used to the antics of Sky-bums and Dirt-Heads. Unloading the Yellow Submarine our heros could not contain they’re glee and performed the little known, soon-to-be-mountain-biking-on-an-unknown-trail-staying-in-a-hotel-room-drinking dance.
Well that its it so far. I’m actually going to ride the trail. Stay tuned for the continuing road trip adventure of The Calfless Wonder and Mango Man.
Posted in Bicycle Stories